Have you ever just gone to a store and an amazing dress that was perfect for that night’s party caught your eye? As you make a run to grab it, you’ve already decided what accessories and shoes you will wear with it. You pick it up, feel the cloth and just melt, but then you see the label and as you turn it, your heart starts to sink. You slowly keep the dress back and walk away. Even though you couldn’t purchase it, that dress was still perfect,but you didn’t start hating it because of what that small label said.
Then why is it so, that we do the same to the people around us?
Two people want to get married, but oh no, they are of the same gender! That can’t be true love. This is wrong because we don’t think the same way, there goes the first label – Gay. That girl? You see what she wore oh her ex’s party? She is so desperate – Slut. She can stand up for herself and doesn’t take shit from anyone – Bitch. Oh did you hear? She is only 16 and drinks – Brat. He is such a goodie two shoes, he lives to please people – Geek. He always makes those girls feel better about themselves – Player. He thinks I’m wrong – Jerk.
Every day we label people, just as often as we change clothes, in fact much more than that. As easy it is to say any of that, it is just as hard to be on the receiving end of it. Is it so hard to go a day without judging someone? Do we really believe that just like we judge people, people wont judge us back?and who are we to spend our time wondering how they should have done it different? Its their choice, let them deal with the consequences, however they may be. How would your life be different if…You stopped making negative judgmental assumptions about people you encounter?
None of us has ever seen a motive. Therefore, we don’t know we can’t do anything more than suspect what inspires the action of another. For this good and valid reason, we’re told not to judge.
Tragedy is that our attention centers on what people are not, rather than on what they are and who they might become.
No one has it all figured out, especially not the people who are acting like they do and judging you because of it. Pretending to be something you aren’t because you’re trying to please a bunch of judgmental hypocrites and shitheads is not the way to be happy. Living the life you want to live is. It really is that simple.
As long as we continue to live as if we are what we do, what we have, and what other people think about us, we will remain filled with judgments, opinions, evaluations, and condemnations. We will remain addicted to putting people and things in their “right” place.”
― Henri J.M Nouven