“I need you – m83” was our so called “official” song. This song was played whenever we were together.. Sitting, eating, dancing, kissing,etc.
It’s a very adorable coincidence that the last thing I said before the exact moment we got into a relationship was “I need you”.
See, I am a type of guy who wouldn’t put any restrictions. There’s this best friend of her’s, he loved her a lot (that’s what he said) but I did not have a problem with her spending time with that guy. I trusted her. (Okay I know it was a blind trust, guilty!) But the thing is that it was all cool.
I mean.. I do not have any problem with that…
Getting back to the point.. Sadly, just two days before my class 12th boards exam she said that she’ll be with me only if I let her make out with other people, the best friend to be specific.
C’mon, ask for my kidney, I’ll give it to you but not that. It hurt.
3rd March to 19th March. I was breathing, my body was functioning properly.. I was existing but… I forgot living.
I caught her cheating on me finally, finally I had a reason to hate… Hate myself a lot. Ashamed of myself, I cried to sleep and woke up just to perform the activities which were on the top, for all of march I became suicidal, I smoked a lot just to make myself calm.
There has been a change in me. I’m happier now, I’m happy being alone and I guess that’s all that matters.
For one, I know he’s happy with himself and that he very well should be, but it’s sad to see someone give up on love. She gave him a reason to, yes. She cheated, she expected things that made him feel like he wasn’t good enough for her, she made him want to kill himself. And I just think that in this cruel world, if we can’t even be true to someone we claim as out “significant other”, that what values are we taking forth for the future? Teaching children that it’s normal for people to cheat, it usual for people to betray one another, that it’s just how it is?
It’s not. That isn’t how it works, it’s not normal or usual or something that just happens because that’s how we think things work these days. We need to learn to not be fake, to just be true to ourselves and simply admit when we make mistakes, the world doesn’t have to be this way and we don’t have to accept things and carry forth the legacy of being unfaithful. And only when we apply this to ourselves can we be in the position to guide anyone else.
I won’t deny the fact that if you want to survive, you must get used to this, you must learn to survive, by hook or by crook. But maybe, just maybe; we can try to not step on others for temporary pleasures and not make someone go so far as wanting to wreck themselves for it.
I mean, we gotta start somewhere right?